The Cell Phone....

Can someone please tell me why the cell phone is soo damn important. Can someone tell me why the cellphone can literally run your day to day life, or perhaps more simply, can someone tell me why it is the every teenager in the world has one of these as if they are soo damn special that they cant possibly go an hour without one. It seems like these are questions that everyone has asked at least once in the last year or two but no one has an answer for it, and even more patheticaly the ones who are asking the questions, nine times out ten are the ones with the phone problems.
I'll start by saying that I have a cell phone and that I fall into the category, of people who could no way go a day without it, so reasons more important then others. I am a salesman and so for my job I need to be in constant contact with my costumers and therefore I can rationalize why I am so deathly afraid of leaving it behind. However, there are people who you know receive calls that less then 10% are business are emergency and still feel that they are "naked" without this technological life support. My boss is a prime example. His phone's screen has some ink leaking in it so he cant read all of his text messages but because he is single there is no way that he can tell the women he talks to that this is a problem. So instead, what does he do? He simply receives all of his texts and then forwards them to his email address and reads them there. Then to reply he writes the email sends it back to his phone and then sends that way so that no one knows what he is doing. On Saturday he did this 42 time, and that is our busiest day at the office. Shit, there is no way that this is healthy. And, if this text messaging is so damn important why the hell hasn't he gone and gotten a new phone. So I asked him and his response was as wistful as Charlze Theron in "Monster, I know that she won an Oscar but come on let me see something. He said, "I would, but there is no way that I could go two days without it and that how long it will take for them to send me a new one." Come on....There is no way that he seriously means that. How is it possible that a 34 year old man can be that dedicated to his cell phone. I mean its almost as if that is a part of his family and that if were to separate from it, there could be some long term ramifications.
And as for teenagers with cell phones. Good Lord don't get me started. Infect all those in favor of teenagers having cell phones, and when I say teenagers I really mean a narrow group from the age of 12-14, please wherever you are and whatever you are doing please stand up and kick yourself in the face, and if you cant perform this, then at least pull the hammy trying. This group could be more addicted to any one piece of technology, then any other generation to any other thing. Shit, when I was thirteen I was just trying to understand why breasts were so cool, but now these teenagers are finding ways to get digits and score, something that I didn't now was a normal practice until my Junior year in high-school. And for all you parents out there who feel that your 8th grader is in NEED of a cell phone, please call child services and report yourself immediately because you are incapable of good parenting, infact, call me first and let me come over and let me hit you in the head with a tac hammer because you are a retard.
So for all you people out there addicted to cell phones, please take this entry to heart because not only are you affecting your own life but all those around you. And remember if you don't get help from me.....Get help somewhere


-scott